Tips in building Resilience in Kids

Some kids are naturally born resilient. Others, however, aren’t as resilient to problems and circumstances in their life.

So what is resilience, anyways?

Resilience is the ability to rise up when you are knocked down by life’s encounters. You are able to bounce back into the groove of things when taken by a hard blow mentally. emotionally, or physically.

Some kids are naturals at this.

For example, when a child falls down while playing, they get up, dust themselves off, and keep going.

Other kids, however, feel the sting far too much when they fall or encounter a situation that doesn’t go their way, putting them into a somewhat state of shock and emotional turmoil.

So what can we, as parents, do to help our kids become more resilient?

I want to provide you with some tips that can help just that. Resilience!

Here are several tips that you can master, and you will be sure to see resilience grow within your children and perhaps in yourself as well.

1. Stay away from negativity.

Our kids watch us and follow our lead. If we are negative thinkers towards people and experiences, we will attract negative circumstances. Our kids will follow this line of thinking. It’s best to stay positive especially when we are around our children so they too can attract positive circumstances. That way, they see us rising up and moving forward which helps them to do the same.

2. Teach your kids that in every circumstance, they have a choice.

I remember a friend of mine who took his children out to a restaurant, and his youngest son was overwhelmed with sadness because they did not go where he wanted to go for food. The child was grumpy, sad, and angry. My friend specifically talked with his son about him having a choice to be happy or sad when circumstances do not go our way.

In that specific moment, he was teaching his child resilience. His child sat by himself for maybe over an hour, refusing to give up this emotion of sadness because he wanted his way.

Eventually, however, his child chose to smile and joined his brother and sister. There was not a problem the rest of the evening. I’ll never forget how my friend described it.

“You have to give them the choice to be happy and teach them that happiness is always there. We [as parents] just have to encourage them to find it. Once you do that, you have to let them be and eventually, they will come around and see that happiness is a much better emotion than sadness.”

3. Make sure your expectations towards your children are at the right level.

 If you expect to much out of your children, they are more likely to consider themselves constantly as failures, and perhaps, may give up on trying to please entirely. It’s better to have expectations that are reachable for your children to allow their self-esteem to grow.

4. Allow your kids to constantly be around inspiring people.

People who have successfully mastered getting over obstacles and reaching their full potential are great role models for your kids, and they teach your kids to keep going even though there are obstacles.

5. Teach your kids gratitude.

Kids who are grateful tend to have a more positive attitude towards people and experiences. If they appreciate what they have, they aren’t as likely to feel a complete loss over something that they do not have.